Thursday, January 9, 2014

Fighting for your life: the enemy from within

Envision, create, and believe in your own universe, and the universe will form around you.--Tony Hsieh 
I'm learning in life that you have to fight for your vision. Everyday is a battle, not between you and the rest of the world, but ironically against yourself, i.e., the skeletons that haunt your closets.  Everyone has these phantoms in the darkest recesses of their minds, they are your fears of failure, of being criticized, of facing rejection, of even trying sashimi and that green stuff!

How many of us have not spoken up for fear of being ridiculed; how many of us have failed to try for fear of rejection; how many of us go home and sink into the comfortable routine of entertainment TV, Online games, facebook, sugary foods and drinks where we consume the products created by other people as we watch on enviously those few who became players, while we sit on the sidelines, forever spectators.  

I always have to remind myself the meaning behind my blog's title, Julie's chopping block; the title reflects a fundamental belief that to find meaning in your life, you have to put yourself out there without fear of ridicule, criticism, rejection or failure.  In fact, it is embracing these "phantoms" that one is able to learn and excel, avoiding them only makes you into a deluded fool.   

Aristotle once said:
There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.
 Of course, this is easier said than done, and "putting yourself on the chopping block" can be psychologically debilitating, but in retrospect, the pain is truly all in your mind.  Most of the time, there is no real bodily harm unless you live in an authoritarian regime, but that's getting off topic.  Assuming you live in a democratic society like the United States, then putting yourself out there to express your creativity has never been easier.

The Internet has made information virtually free and accessible to all, and never has it been easier to learn and be heard.  But yet so many of us continue to live as though in an authoritarian regime, keeping silent and passive for fear of reprisal.  But what reprisal is there?   Reflecting on my own life, there is only the reprisal of emotional discomfort that comes from fear of failure, and the big scary "unknoooown."  But is that really worth giving up your dreams?  Everyone has to answer that for themselves, but for me, I think not.

And so, everyday is a battleground where you have to fight for your vision, i.e., the vision you have for your life, the vision you have for the world you want to create. It will not be easy because you will face a great wall of resistance, which will shake your confidence, your faith, the very core of your identity, because in the beginning you will be laughable, you will be foolish, and you will "suck".  But your greatest enemy won't be the audience laughing at you, instead it will be you.  Because it will be your choice to give-up or persevere.  And should you persevere and learn from your experiences, you will in fact be building your foundations on solid rock.  Even the greatest pros were amateurs once.

I remember going to a local artist joint where a young musician was playing.  He definitely had raw talent but he was kind of weird, he had on thick glasses (Harry Potter's double?), was obviously nervous and kept on saying the dumbest things, quite a dork!  But later on, I was ashamed of myself because he at least had the balls to pursue his dreams, whereas I was sitting in the dark amongst a sea of faceless spectators, merely pointing and snickering but having no more of a spine than a jellyfish.

So if ever you find the courage to climb "onstage" and see people snickering instead of applauding, find comfort in the fact that you, at least, are no longer a faceless, nameless spectator, but a real player on the way to transforming your vision into a reality.   

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